How Can One Best Navigate Differing Beliefs?

Spoiler alert: by caring!

This can actually become a trick question rather quickly. Especially when we are talking about the workspace. Because lets face it, what you are doing in the privacy of your own home, isn’t exactly visible. Even though differing beliefs can be challenging to maneuver in any environment, that’s for sure.

Since the Supreme (or not so supreme, in my humble opinion) Court overturned Roe v. Wade, differing beliefs are front and center once again. Much like a few weeks ago, when we were still discussing how much sense it makes, that eighteen year old, very disturbed, young adults, have unlimited access to assault rifles. Astonishing, how quickly we are “done” with these kind of topics, isn’t it? But I digress. Missed the whole Roe v. Wade decision? Find more details here.

Oh, and does anyone remember the discussion around whether or not to get a Covid-19 vaccine? I do, but then I do have a photographical memory. Feels like it’s been yesterday and years ago at the same time.

Even without these most recent events, where many different people come together, not necessarily by choice, there is a lot of room for differing beliefs. And with that, for conflict. If the place we are talking about is the company you are working at, it’s worth thinking about strategies how to deal with this.

But let me be very clear – if any of these different beliefs is some kind of -ism (racism, sexism, ageism, ableism etc.) which leads to people being treated unfairly, disrespected, disadvantaged or even bullied, the only right strategy is calling it out, reporting it and not tolerating if nothing is done about it. Period.

The same applies to any and all situations, where the human rights of certain groups of individuals are limited. Those are the moments to not shy away from the difficult discussion and be clear where you stand. In my opinion. If you disagree with this, you might be in the wrong article, but you are welcome to stay!

Most of you already know, that ONE SIZE DOES NOT FIT ALL 💚. So what’s coming next, are my personal strategies, combined with a personal story as an example.

My personal strategies to navigate differing beliefs (not including discriminating beliefs!):

One Size Does Not Fit All

Holding myself accountable to this is not difficult for me. If it is for you, remind yourself of all the times someone wanted you to do something exactly their way, you did it your way and it worked out. If it works this way, how can it not be true the other way around? It requires us to accept, that our choices in life (religion – or not, partner, profession, health care measures etc.) aren’t the only right choices.

My Beliefs Are Mine

Even if I feel very strongly about my beliefs, I am not a missionary. My job is to manage a customer service operations. It is not my job to change someone’s beliefs. No matter how strong my personal beliefs might be. In the workspace I can disagree – politely- but should never argue someone else’s beliefs.

If we don’t want others to push their beliefs on us, we need to give them the same courtesy.

Bonus tip: I like to remind myself, that my head is not a judgment free zone, but that I can still control my reaction (blog post here).

Find the Commonality

To maintain a professional, polite and respectful work environment, despite differing beliefs, it helps to look for commonalities. Sometimes, those can even be found in the the very thing that we disagree on. Say what?

Let me explain by sharing a personal story:

I am a strong believer in the Covid-19 vaccine and could not wait for the vaccines to be finally available to me. I was even naïve enough to think that, aside from maybe a few radical anti-vaxxers, everyone must feel the same, after all the impacts Covid-19 had on our lives. And of course, I was wrong. A lot of people declined and keep declining the vaccine and this is very tough for me to deal with. I am afraid to get Covid-19 and the more people are vaccinated, the better the protection for everyone. That is at least my, science backed, belief.

Yet, I do have dear colleagues, who are important to me, who have completely different beliefs on this matter. And as a colleague and people leader, I have to deal with that fact in a professional way. Professional, human and respectful. So, I am looking for the commonality – the thing that unites us here and that is fear. I am fearing the Covid-19 infection more, than potential negative side effects from the vaccine. For them it is the other way around. But who am I to argue with fear, when I am fearful myself?

So instead of arguing in the workplace, making colleagues or potentially people reporting to me, feel criticized, not accepted or, worst case, turning into a “bully” myself, I am focusing on the things I can empathize with.

Agree to Disagree

We don’t have to have the same beliefs, to treat each other respectfully, successfully work together or even be friend(ly)s. But it might require, to agree to disagree on certain topics and let those rest entirely. We are adults, this should be something we can do.

We have to have a conversation about this, though, as agreeing to disagree on different beliefs is not very effectful, if it only happens in our own head. Both parties need to buy into this agreement.

A few last thoughts on the latest in Social Media…

Looking at LinkedIn right now, it’s all about judgment. People do not only have strong feelings about the actual topic, others are jumping in because they are having strong opinions about what others should or should not be feeling, saying, posting, sharing and so on.

My stance is, people are sharing their concerns and fears as they are feeling that their human rights have been restricted / eliminated and more decisions just like this one are likely to come soon. I am scared and really upset about it. Yet I am also fully clear, that this is my personal opinion and that I am not necessarily speaking for others. I am certainly not demanding that others should say or do the same – I just wish they would, which is a different story.

Please, can we stop telling people how they should or should not be feeling? It’s getting old.

Maybe we can try my strategies above instead and not only in the workspace?

Take care!